what it is important for me,is it important for you?

what a weird question, but right now i can say,no...i dont mind almost anything of what others say or think about anything of me and i dont think they mind my oppinion, either what i want...talking in especific case of a relationship, there is a moment when you arrive reminding all what you both had lived together and then it starts the comparisons, the lacks and the disapearing of certain facts that made (me) the other to fall in love..certain details that you took as especial with you, but ofcourse that you thought it was part of his normal life...or his behavior i mean....details that women always consider, nothing about presents or gifts eh!...is more details of consideration for the other, showing you care of him or her.

at the end i have the conclusion that time doesnt pass in vane and love is not disconected of this, even loving the same you will not act all your life as in the begining of any relationship and without doubts that relation is gona change into 2 things....a relation of friendship plus love, but a love more calmed and with less passion...or a relationship without anything to share, cuz even if it was a passionated relation in the begining the lack of details will kill that in the other person...usually in case of girls...but could also happen in men who cares about the feelings of the other and what their actions express, maybe i am confusing, but now i talk for my own things, so is just a way to get empty in a kind of healthy way.

of course always is better to say the things and not keeping them, but when there is a time you repeat and reapeat the same things and the other doesnt WANNA listen, what can you do?...seems more time to stop everything and to take time to think better where am i going with this relationship??...is it really going anywhere?...i dont even know...which already answer 50% of my doubts about this relation..ive never been totally secure of it..even being together...cuz yeah we have not been together all the time, so even together i hdd always a doubt for one or other thing (atitude details) that didnt let me enjoy or at least to think in a future, thats why im always changing of idea about it, cuz one day i am...well betetr said...i want to feel secure so i make plans and base my fututre on them but then it comes the time where all thsoe plans are frustated for differences that we always had and we always will have, but that i try to overpass them to really start good, but each time i tried it anything happens that make me to throw everything over the floor and to re-evaluate if i really must continue with this or just to stop "wasting" my time, my life!!!... insisting on something that always ends to disappoint me for any reason. maybe is not big reasons...maybe i exagerate or maybe i am right...thats my problem...i am not able to see clear the importance of each thing, cuz they had been kind of many ones that disappointed me and always i tried to excuse them, even if i tried to overpass them...i dont think i really did it, cuz i cant avoid to remember them each time we get bad....well now i remember "new" things...before i had others that dont disappear either, but i dont mention them as before...even if i tired to excuse them and to forget in order to advance into a healthy relation...they are always in my mind like a remind of...."people never change".

anyways...either i want to look as if i had a relation of hell...is not that, but i arrive into a point where i want to think on more serious things and i want to advance more and even if is me the one also keeping this relation stuck...i see details in the others atitude that make me think....is it gona be like that forever?...question that doesnt make me happy at all cuz the only answer i have in mind for it is..yes....

what i think sometimes is...if i give me the chance to other?... i have 2 possibilities that it could be good...which has 2 more possibilities that it will work good cuz that person is what i need or that goes bad or worse than my actual one which takes me back into the same road...and even makes me to waste more time... which will take me into a possible dilema of....i lost something "good" i had for years, but that was not filling me completely at that time...n "now" i realize was better but as i decided to go for another chance to "see" how it goes...i probably already lost it....

so the question is....is good to take the risk to have something better or to keep the doubt forever cuz i didnt take the risk??.....i hate to wonder this to myself, but is not only my fault, the things are like that cuz of us.